The Final Post

So this is it.

The end of this blogging journey
Photo courtesy of myself

I am extremely doubtful that I will ever write another blog post after this one, an awareness that's accompanied with a sense of both relief and sorrow. We are nearing the end of this school year, my blog's expiration date.

Where was I when I started my blogging journey? I was admittedly very confused, unsure how I could possibly manage everything that was bound to be thrown at me. I've grown slightly, although I don't feel like much has changed.

I've learned a lot from blogging, as stupid and vaguely cliché as that sounds. Being given an outlet is an amazing feeling. I was able to release stress by writing ridiculous theories about the universe, I was able to distract myself from other things I was worried about, and I was able invest a piece of my mind in one of the first school assignments that has ever truly been fun.

I honestly don't think much has changed since the fall, when I began contributing to this blog. Other than creating some sort of digital journal for my future self, nothing extremely life-changing has come out of this assignment. However, I still feel like it was worth it. I learned from this experience.

Mostly, I learned that it's impossible to escape some things, like the extensive workload you're bound to be given and the bad things you're going to feel. You can manage, though. As people, we forget how tough we are. It's not like the video games, because in reality you only get one life and most people still live an average of 78 years. There are moments when things feel really bad and that's okay. I know that's okay.

I'm not going to tell you that you can do anything or some bullshit like that because I'm not a motivational speaker. It's just that, this year, I've found out that hard things are possible. Maybe I'm bound to fail the AP test this upcoming Friday and, yeah, I've bombed lots of assignments this year. But all these terribly stressful difficulties are things that I've accomplished. I survived my first year in high school! Look at me go.

So where am I today? Still confused, that's for sure. I still have no clue what I'm doing and maybe I never will know, but I've decided that nobody really does. It's okay to feel lost because we are living in a world full of people who feel the exact same way. We're all stumbling around blindly, searching for places where we feel okay. I think people are like puzzles – yes, in the way that we're all looking for ways to put each other together, but in a different way, too. I think we hand out puzzle-pieces of ourselves like flyers on the sidewalk corner. Me? I've given a piece of myself to my friends, to my family. To dance, art, writing, photography, reading, music, movies…things I love. Things I can't lose.

Now, the human mind is a complicated thing. I'm never going to know all the secrets of the universe, but I know this: everyone's trying to find something to root themselves in. Perhaps a religion, a band, someone to love. People want to feel safe. And everyone needs somewhere where they can be whoever they want to be, free of fear or discomfort. Maybe a group of friends, a church, a social media site.

Or maybe a blog.

A/N: Thank you to anyone who has actually been reading my blog (my friends, mostly). People who have left compliments – especially the few that stopped me in the hall to tell me they loved my writing when I didn't even realize they knew about it. This was a cool journey. Thanks for sharing it with me.
Also, I'm allowed to be sappy and superficial and fake-deep because this was an entire school-year of my life and I feel bizarrely attached to it. Thank you. This is the end.

A Realization

I was sitting casually in my bedroom, thinking about this blog that I've sort grown tired of writing for, when I realized something: Nothing on this blog matters at all.

The "description" under the header of my blog has always said "This is my blog, I talk about things that matter" but today I have come to realize that this is a massive lie. As a person who talks constantly about existentialism and the inevitability of oblivion, it's fairly obvious that nothing I've written on this blog is actually "important." I feel like my description should instead read, "This is my blog, I talk about things that don't matter."

If you know me at all, it's obvious that I believe humanity is insignificant to the universe. Yes, all people contribute to shaping the world in some way and yes, everything that you do has led you up to reading this sentence. But this blog, in all honesty, is very negligible. The world would still turn and people would still go about their daily lives if I had never created it. The only thing that would change, really, is the amount of homework I'd have to complete.

Now, this isn't a blog post just to talk about how unimportant we all are (I've written one of those before). I just thought I would mention it because I suddenly realized that I sound very arrogant. I do not talk about things that matter, because different things matter to different people. Claiming that I am one of the only people who writes about these things (that probably don't matter) makes me feel sort of ridiculous.

Anyway, now that I've started this blog post, I should probably make a point.

I don't know about you, but a part of me feels like my life is unimportant. Maybe it's because I'm not Beyoncé, or maybe it's because I'm so small in comparison to the massive universe. This is sort of irrelevant to what I was just talking about but think about it: There are, what, 7.12 billion people on this planet? You're 0.000000000014035% of the planet's population – I looked it up. While maybe that's something that makes you feel small, it's also sort of amazing. In a world full of frustrating, vaguely annoying people, you were given this little life in which you go to school and eat fruits and vegetables. It feels nice, almost, to be so unimportant.

If you think about it, it would sort of suck to be famous. You've seen the movies: a pop star with her life planned out by someone else, stuck in a cycle of paparazzi and crazed fans. That's not what I'm talking about, though. Your life is an extremely personal thing. To be given your own hands and a mind that no one else could ever understand…it's sort of extraordinary.

It's like that Bill Nye quote: "Everyone you will ever meet knows something you don't." Everything that is currently shoved into your brain, everything that matters to you, and all the knowledge you've ever been given is all yours. No one will ever understand things like you do. You have a mind of your own with opinions unlike others'. You're a singular, individual personality. You're a separate person, detached from the realm of this troublesome world, and you exist.

This is absolutely the stupidest picture I've ever put on a blog post but.
Look! We're all different colored fish :)
Image Credit Here

A/N: I sort of went off on a tangent (10 points to Gryffindor for the use of the Vital Vocab word), so I apologize. To summarize: my blog does not matter at all, but it's alright because being small and distinctive is a good thing in a world full of different people who will never know you at all.

The Curse Of The Tuesday

A/N: The amount that I wanted to swear in this post was sort of unbelievable. But I refrained myself, so don't worry.

I think everyone should know that Tuesdays are the absolute worst day of the week.

There are ignorant, social-norm-conforming people who would argue that Mondays are much worse, but these people are very incorrect. You see, Tuesdays suck. At least on Monday it's the first day of the week, so you can have a little bit of the mindset, "Woo hoo! A fresh new week!" On Tuesday, you're stuck in the terrible in-between that's much too far from the weekend and not early enough to be inspiring.

At the beginning of this school year, someone cursed my Tuesdays. This sounds ridiculous (frankly it is ridiculous) but it happened. I can't reveal too much information in fear of exposing this person, so I'm not going to tell the story. But know this: it was not a good day. It was humiliating and awful and ended with mutual hatred toward this person. The conflict lasted a week, and by the end my Tuesdays had been officially cursed.

Everything about Tuesdays is bad now. Let me give you an example:

Yesterday (a Tuesday), I went to open my lunch box for food, right? And my yogurt had exploded everywhere, leaving a pool of strawberry gunk at the bottom of my lunch box. Now, normally I would start laughing hideously and probably make a gigantic joke about it. This is not what happened. I guess I wasn't really having a good day or something so when I unzipped my lunch box, I burst into tears.

I sat there crying for a solid ten minutes as my friends watched me, most likely stifling laughter. Aside from a small yogurt-soaked ziplock of popcorn I'd managed to fish out from the top of my bag, the rest of my lunch was ruined. It wasn't a big deal but I cried about it, for some reason. I have no shame in admitting it, either.

Anyway, it has been an ongoing joke between me and my friends: The Curse Of The Tuesday.

The Space Shuttle Challenger before it exploded,
killing 7 crew members (on a Tuesday)
Image Credit Here

I did some research, and I'm not entirely sure that this is a curse on me specifically. I decided that all Tuesdays are just bad. Possibly for everyone, these are simply awful days.

The September 11 attacks, for example, occurred on a Tuesday. There were nearly 3,000 casualties. Or, in 1986, the space shuttle Challenger broke apart a minute after takeoff, and this happened on a Tuesday. The stock market crash of 1929 was given the name "Black Tuesday." Elvis Presley died on a Tuesday, which most likely sucked for all the people who liked Elvis Presley. The Columbine shootings in Colorado also occurred on a Tuesday, where two high schoolers killed thirteen people.

I think The Curse Of The Tuesday is a universal thing. Nobody likes Tuesdays. And if you're one of the few people who wake up full of joy on the second day of the week then good for you, you little optimist. But I hope this knowledge has somewhat informed you.

Next time Tuesday roles around, consider this. And, hopefully, Tuesdays aren't as awful for you as they are for the rest of us.

What's Wrong With Technology?

How many times have you been scolded for being on your phone? Personally, I'm been reprimanded constantly from my mother, as I'm sure most teenagers have been. I've discovered that often the people criticizing the use of technology are the same people who are incapable of utilizing it.

I don't understand why so many adults are convinced technology has a negative influence on our lives. Like all things, of course, there are adverse traits, but the amount of technological advances we've experienced over the years is incredible. 

There are cars being sold now that run without gasoline. People can search for cancer with only a simple blood test. Printers exist that can develop 3D objects – scientists are even trying to print live organs for donation. The technology in our world today is absolutely amazing.

I understand that most adults aren't complaining about this. Majority of the people who whine about technology are directing their issue toward teenagers, a group of kids who are known for being completely obsessed with their screens. But why is this so bad? Sure, it's not easy for most of us to go a day without utilizing technology, but that is the world we live in. We are the generation that is going to grow up and invent the flying cars and mechanical surgeons that save lives. We are the generation that is going to use our knowledge and our technically-savvy minds to fix holes in our planet. Technology is not a bad thing, so stop treating it like it is.

Look how many positive things come from technology!!!!
Image Credit

And if you're the type of person that scolds others for being on their phones in public, shame on you. You don't know what they're looking at. Maybe they're reading a letter from their Grandma who just passed away, studying for a geography test or looking at pictures of their old friends that don't live near them anymore. Maybe they had a shit day and all they want to do is sit peacefully on the bus and play a cat game. Good for them.

If you think that a teenager (or any person, really) should look up from their cellphones and absorb the world around them, please shut up. Technology is not ruining our lives, and seeing a person on their phone in public is not "sad." It's common. It's useful. It's necessary. We live in a world surrounded by technology, so if you're against that then I'm pretty sure it's your own fault. 

A/N: This is kind of harsh. It started out as a rant toward my mother concerning her constant lectures for being on my phone… I got a bit carried away.

My New Year's Resolution

Photo courtesy here

Today is the second day of year 2016, and I feel sort of grossly cliché for writing a blog post about this.

I spent New Year's Eve with a small group of my close friends, most of it laying on the carpet and making awful jokes about 2015's trends. When the clock struck midnight we set off those annoying popper things and made a mess that we later had to clean up. Emma and I shared a large blanket when we went outside to light sparkles in the snow. We played good music and drank effervescent champagne.

The second we entered 2016, social media was instantly blown up with posts and cheesy quotes like "New Year, New Me!!" This entire concept is sort of amusing. People use a measurement of time to excuse their lack of work ethic or accomplishments; they use this absurd holiday to make themselves feel better about not fulfilling their goals, because now they can create new resolutions that they will again fail to achieve.

I've decided only to develop one resolution this year, considering I believe them to be stupid.

My New Year's resolution is to never have New Year's resolutions again.

According to this website, only 8% of people are successful in achieving their resolutions. So I honestly don't see the point in my making them.

Plus, if you want to change something about yourself, you are perfectly capable of doing this at any moment throughout the year. You don't have to wait until January 1st in order to fix your life. People often grow oblivious to this, but as humans we are very capable of fixing things – especially things about ourselves. You may see yourself as indecisive or boisterous, but you can change your own traits. If you're sick of being too loud or too shy then stop. Your personality is not set in stone. If you don't want to act the way you do, don't. If you don't want to do the things you do, don't.

You're allowed to alter your own characteristics. Dye your hair orange. Take on a new sport. Learn how to cook Indian food. If you're not satisfied with the way your life is, change it. You don't have to keep waiting until a new year rolls around in order to get things done.

A/N: I'm aware that it's not the 2nd of January anymore, but that's when I started formulating this post. I originally wrote an entire blog post about my actual New Year's resolutions, but then I realized how pointless they were so I rewrote this. I hope this is still a valid topic to discuss even though we've been in 2016 for 5 days now.

Settle For Less

A student comes home with their final report card, disappointed in some aspects but somewhat proud. They've received mostly A's and B's, along with a single D but that doesn't really bother them. They worked hard this semester and are fairly pleased with their good grades.

The second they enter the kitchen their mom/dad asks to see their report card. As a parent, their eyes go directly to the D. Their first response is immediately "You got a D in History?" because that's what they see. That's what doesn't fulfill their expectations.

As a student, their parent's retaliation seems heart crushing. The student didn't think it was that bad. One D, they thought. My other grades were all good, they thought.

It's disturbing that most adults focus on kids' failures as opposed to their successes.

This is true in all situations. This is the reason that adults constantly ridicule the younger generation for everything; technology, for example, is not appreciated for being impressive and revitalizing – it's scoffed upon for being distracting. This is the reason that kids don't feel appreciated for their hard work.

This comes up on Google Images if you search "parents clipart"
Photo Courtesy

It's not just parents, either. Everyone does this. All people subconsciously focus in on the substandard things rather than admiring what they have achieved. All people work a harder to become something more; all people strive to be good enough.

So, is it ever going to be good enough? Or does everyone keep reaching for a report card…an approving smile…a lifestyle…that's unachievable? If the student works hard enough, will their parents ever look at them and say they're perfect? And if they say it, are they lying? Of course it could be better; it could always be better. No matter what it is, you could achieve more.

For some people this is inspirational. If you can always improve, then there's always something to reach for. This is a form of motivation.

For others, however, this reality is immensely defeating. No matter how hard you work, how fast you climb, or how hard you try, you'll never reach the absolute maximum of human accomplishment.

So settle for less. Do everything to your best ability, and be proud of yourself for it. Look at your report card and think, hey, I worked really hard on this. Don't ever deride yourself for not being good enough, and don't let anyone degrade you for your pride.

Flaws In The Education System #2

You Aren't Learning Anything Beneficial

Around 55 million kids in America are enrolled in elementary or secondary schools. Every day, approximately 55 MILLION American students sit in classrooms. Yet, according to Ecudemic, the United States isn't even one of the world's top 10 education systems. So what is everyone in our country doing? To sit in classrooms (1,680 hours each year, by the way)…does that even benefit us at all? Are we learning the wrong things?

Half the things you're taught in school don't help you succeed.

Everyone has wondered this. Everyone has sat in a classroom and groaned internally, knowing that this curriculum would never be used outside of the school walls. This is a question commonly asked by a confused math student: "When are we ever going to use any of this?"

Upon being asked this, I've found that most teachers respond with one of two things:

1. They'll list a specific job category that uses this curriculum (sometimes minimally), and often it's something that no one wants to grow up and pursue. For example, "Construction workers use this all the time!" or "My husband's sister's daughter majored in ophthalmology, and she uses this every day!"

2. Either that, or the teacher will sigh and make the student feel guilty for asking the question. I have a theory that this is just a ploy to get out of the situation without answering the question at all. They'll say something like, "This is the worst question. I hate this question, I absolutely hate it. I'm just…I'm going to pretend that you didn't just ask that. Wow…" Then they'll pause, let everyone wade in the uncomfortable silence, and say, "Alright then, let's get on with the lesson."

Teacher being a teacher
Photo Courtesy

But the thing is, school doesn't really teach you anything worth knowing.

We're not taught how to get to know people or how to make someone laugh. We're not taught how raise a dog or how much to tip the waiter at a restaurant. We're not taught how to manage 4 hours of homework after 5 hours of schoolwork, and we're not taught how to cope with the stress or the anxiety or the pressure. We're not even taught how to pay taxes. I have no idea what a mortgage is. Instead, we're taught the plot of Greek literature and the history of Israel's wars. We're taught how to formulate arithmetic sequences and how to label the protons and electrons of a Phosphate. We're taught such unnecessary things. And what do we learn? I don't know about everyone else, but so far I've mastered how to befriend teachers and how to bullshit three-page essays in under an hour.

School is supposed to be a privilege. Kids are supposed to wake up and want to learn things. Our education is being sucked out from under us, and now we are confused high schoolers with monotone answers to questions we don't care about.

Look at us. We're learning nothing useful.